Grandpa Humor

Have you ever heard of "Grandpa Humor?" Having children makes me familiar with the term... all too familiar. Grandpa humor centers around the act of buying grandchildren large, noisy, and/or obnoxious items from the nearest Wal-Mart and then sending the said item(s) home with the grandchildren immediately upon the purchase. When the grandchildren have been delivered home, the grandpa then later calls the parents of the grandchildren and asks loaded questions such as, "Are you enjoying that new ____ ?" The call is followed by the grandpa having a rip-roaring time laughing at the parents of the grandchildren while blatantly delighting in the fact that the item was never designed to reside at his own house in the first place. Examples of gifts purchased as a result of Grandpa Humor are as follows:

1. Any large outdoor tent purchased along with a simultaneously whispered suggestion of, "That would go well in your bedroom."

2. Large train sets that the parents may or may not suspect have been purchased solely for the accompanying engine noise. Attempts at normal conversation within a proximity of ten feet must be immediately aborted.

3. Difficult to maneuver remote control toys. The harder to operate, the better.

4, Low rider cars with push button Latin music and/or loud electric guitar riffs.

5. Stuffed animals that play music when you pinch their paws... a lack of volume adjustment is a desirable feature. It's also good if the animal advertises "no off switch" and an "unearthly battery life."

6. Baseball bats.

7. Golf clubs.

8. Plastic bowling sets.

and finally...

9. Odd headwear. Odd headwear of any kind really.

Jack loves all of his Papas.