4. Jack is also sort of tilted, and that's weird.

Recently I and my coworkers were given an end of the school year gift. It was a lovely gesture on my boss's part. It was really and truly nice and, I believe, meant to be kind of a goodbye gift to many of us that will not be a part of her staff at the beginning of next school year. Each staff member was set up with a family portrait session and a free 8x10 from Lifetouch Photography, the same folks that take the yearbook headshots in the fall. A free family portrait! How sweet. I eagerly signed my name on the sign up sheet that was taped to the mailbox room coke machine. The Hoodenpyles would be photographed at a park in the early morning on a Saturday. I looked forward to it.

The photographs are in. I think my family's photograph is good, but the more I look at it... the more awkward it gets. Here it is. Stare at it for 2 seconds, and you'll like it. Stare at it for 12 seconds. Your left eyebrow will raise, and you'll cock your head to the left. At 34 seconds, you'll have a list of strange things about this photo. Maybe you'll even be laughing as hard as I am right now.

Let's compare lists right now:

1. The scenery. There's nothing like dead grass and a crappy bench for a photoshoot.

2. Emma. She has the Barrymore Firestarter expression. Shudder.

3. The arrangement of the subjects... specifically, Jack. If this photo had a caption, it would read, "Sometimes we let him come in the house on the weekends."

But really, this photo WAS free, and it's only mildly awkward, I guess. Visit http://www.awkwardfamilyphotos.com/ and you'll understand that awkward can get WAY more... awkward-er. Here are a few of my favorites that, like our photo, feature 'unique' family poses.