Before we begin the toy parade, let me just say that all of these toys crazes begin with ONE single, solitary student discreetly bringing out a strange new thingamabob from his/her backpack, placing it on his/her desk, and fiddling. Fiddling, fiddling, and more fiddling. If he/she calls it by a human name while fiddling, it only feeds the hysteria. I could almost do a wild-animal style documentary about it. The documentary would have narration. With an Australian accent.
Here are a few items that have caused a frenzy just this year... and have also made me want to strangle myself with a shoestring, at some point.
Beyblades
Beyblades. I don't know what's so great about them. Beyblades are just spinning tops, honestly. The red thing is an arena where you use a rip cord to spin and drop your top (I mean, Beyblade). The beyblades "battle". Battle = spin around and bump into each other, causing loss of speed. If your Beyblade spins the longest, congratulations. You have just acquired honor and prestige among your peers. You will marry well.
Silly Bandz (Justin Bieber shaped ones... to be extra fancy)
Despite the appearance of the picture above, Silly Bandz are no bigger than the palm of your hand. They are actually bracelets. Bracelets in in the form of shapes, notice. Silly Bandz enjoyed a relatively short stint of fame in my room, but ohhh the fame was intense! Girls and boys, alike, drooled over Silly Bandz. The trading was constant. And if you were really lucky, your arm from wrist to elbow could be filled with them. It was also a neat trick to wrapped them so tight that your bloodflow was impeded. Fun!
Orbeez.
Orbeez. Hmm... I'm starting to notice that any toy that takes an s ending and changes it to a z for coolness factor is bad news. Orbeez, thanks to all that is good, did not last especially long in my classroom. Let me copy and paste the official commercial description for you fine folks.
"...are wet and wacky, soft and squishy, fun and funky, bouncy and beautiful. They start off hard and tiny. Add water and watch them grow to 100 times ..."
Oh yeah. You don't even need to hear more. Orbeez were a bad idea, toy distributors. Why do you hate me so?
Squinkies
Squinkies are a current sensation here in my room. They are tiny, tiny, tiny little creatures that live in clear plastic encasements the size of marbles. When a child talks about his/her beloved Squinkies, his/her voice automatically raises an octave or two. When Squinkies fall on the floor (and they fall often) they roll very, very far, causing a spreading wave of distraction from the math lesson that is trying to be conducted at that moment. Yahoo for Squinkies!
Shizzle! Magnetic Rocks
And now, I'd like to tell you about what arrived today! I'm so excited. Shizzle! Magnetic rocks. These are especially cool because when you toss them into the air together, the magnetism causes them to spin around and knock against each other. The sound is like none I can replicate. But it's loud. It's buzzy. And it's in just the right frequency to make you crave... YEARN... to hear nails on a chalkboard instead. Yep, I hate them. Fo shizzle.
Think back to your childhood, everyone. Do you remember all the silly things you brought to school? I brought those chainlink plastic necklaces with an insane amount of charms that hung from them. I brought pogo balls. I brought My Little Ponies. I brought jelly bracelets and Swatch watches with the protective rubber band cover that matched my every outfit. Yeah, I brought my fair share, I guess. Twenty some years later, I'd like to formally apologize to all of my elementary school teachers. I'm so very, very sorry. :)
The perfect end to the worst SCHOOL day. Thank you for making me laugh. Fo shizzle, my nizzle.
ReplyDeleteI am sooo out of the (annoying preteen) toy loop. I only knew of silly bandz. I would LOVE to see your documentary of this WITH Australian accent. Mainly because I want to hear Fo Shizzle in Australian. :)
ReplyDeleteI would like to add my apologies for the slap bracelets from my 4th-ish grade year.
Hang in there ... summer vacation is just a few weeks away!
This so made me laugh today on a day that I really needed to!! Thank you and thank goodness the magnetic rocks have not made it to my room yet!
ReplyDeleteI cut Silly Bandz into smaller pieces if they come off your wrist. Only needed to happen once as 40 wide eyes watched in horror. My kids are into sign making and petitions, rather than toys. It's equally as draining.
ReplyDeleteThanks for explaining what BeyBlades are! Boys are always showing me the picture they drew of their BeyBlades and until now, I had no idea what they were. And I must admit to the My Little Pony craze. My first one was a unicorn with purple hair named 'Glory'. Oh, how I loved her...
ReplyDeleteI am interested in these marbles that have come to my room in little jars of water... what are these things? As you can see, I don't ask questions, I just look at them and say, "Backpack, now."
ReplyDeleteAndrea, I too have a class filled with kids who draw and petition. I really should plant a few trees.